Ms. Sassy,
My girlfriend smart and talented, she's one of those people who's good at everything she does but she can't cook. Try as she might, everything she cooks ends up in my napkin instead of in my stomach. I don't want to hurt her feelings but I don't know what else to do. I just can't take her nasty cooking anymore!
-Bad Cook

Bad Cook,
This is a very delicate situation. If you tell her her food sucks she may very well try to poison in an effort to seek retribution for you bruising her ego. Your best bet is to surprise her with cooking classes. Just go with me on this one. Tell her that you heard about this couples cooking class and you want the two of you to go because you want to learn to cook and having her with you at the lesson will make it more fun and you think it'll be a great way for you two to spend time together. You'll be able to cook together and help her out when she's making the meals so you won't feel like such a bum. She'll be overjoyed that you were purely thinking of her in an effort to better yourself. And she'll have a few dishes under her belt that don't make you vomit, or you can opt to cook for her. Either way it gives you way more options for actually eating edible food.
Am I a genius or what?
-Ms. Sassy